dating

  1. What Is My Kink?

    What Is My Kink?

    WHAT'S MY KINK?

    It seems every person on the planet has some kind of Kink that they're either interested in trying or desperate to keep doing. Having a special kind of consensual sexual interaction that you like the most does not make you a freak, at least not anymore. Where I live in LA, entire communities of kinky people get together under a common interest, and many of those interests are not exactly mainstream. It got me thinking. What is my Kink? I'm an open-minded lady. I'm tolerant, I'm accepting, I open my arms to all kinds. So why don't I have a kink? I went on a hunt to figure it out.

    WHAT IS A KINK?

    Since I'm no sex-meister, I referred to Los Angeles based marriage family and sex therapist Liz Selzer-Lang, LMFT, for a professional explanation. She explained that in the professional world they don't refer to someone as having a kink:

    "Kink is a broad, umbrella term that describes many forms

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  2. Sex & the City & the Quarantine

    Sex & the City & the Quarantine

    Sex & the City & the Quarantine: What We’ve Learned About Ourselves in Isolation

    It’s now January 2021, and, just like that, the United States has been in some semblance of quarantine for almost a year now. Workplaces have gone remote, masks have become a trendy fashion statement, class is now in session via Zoom, and the landscape surrounding sex and dating has changed dramatically. I couldn’t help but wonder - during a year in isolation, how have we grown in our relationships with our partners and with ourselves? How have we gotten acclimated to the “new normal” in ways we might not have even noticed in regards to our dating and sex lives? How have we become closer with our bodies and ourselves during this time of forced solitude?

    Here are a few of the lessons we’ve learned about ourselves and our bodies (and our libidos) during a year-long quarantine period:

    ● The saying “absence makes the heart grow fonder” couldn’t be more true.

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  3. Sexual Anxiety: We Shall Overcum!

    Sexual Anxiety: We Shall Overcum!

     

    Lots of people have experienced sexual anxiety. Feeling anxious about our sex skills is totally normal, but it can really ruin a horny moment when it happens more than not

    I have Generalized Anxiety Disorder, and I’ve learned in therapy that anxiety is a future-oriented emotion. The majority of my anxiety comes from future-tripping – what if they have a terrible time? Maybe they think I’m too loose! I forgot to shave. They’re gonna leave me!

    Because of these anxious thoughts, I try to stay present when it comes to sex and not focus on a particular outcome. What can I say? I wasn’t born knowing how to bang.

    Sexual anxiety is something that people of all ages deal with, even if they consider themselves a sexual dynamo. Sometimes, this type of anxiety can be situational and pop up because of a new sexual encounter. Other people might find it hard to have great sex on a regular basis because they have an anxiety disorder. Oh hello!

     

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  4. Don’t Touch My Hair...Unless I Tell You To

    Don’t Touch My Hair...Unless I Tell You To
    Hey--is my mic on? Good; I have a few things to get off my chest. To the surprise of literally no one, 2020 started ugly and it only got uglier. It’s been more than rough for everyone. This year didn’t stop at a global health pandemic and losing some of our most beloved icons; it threw in an extra helping of crazy ahhh weather too. It’s been ghastly, but like sex, life requires patience. Let’s all collectively breathe and agree to look at this from a different angle.
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  5. The Best Vibe for Your Zodiac Sign

    The Best Vibe for Your Zodiac Sign

    By Gabriela Herstik

    We get it; sometimes you just wanna get off. In our opinion, sex toys are the perfect way to amp up your sex life, adding some extra good vibes whether you’re going solo or with a partner. Vibrators are a vagina-owning persons’ best friend, but with so many delicious and delectable options out there, the question isn’t if to start but where? We’ve turned to the cosmos for a little sexy inspiration, to help match up each zodiac sign with a vibrator that is sure to blow them away. Read on for your match made in heaven.

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  6. Keep it Close: Surviving Long Distance Relationships

    Keep it Close: Surviving Long Distance Relationships

    By Amara Purlle

    Ahh, long distance relationships. LDRs...lovers daring romance...lengthy doting rituals...loooong dry-spell run.... In this post, Amara Purlle cast the net out to...the net...to see what her people’s more recent LDR experiences have been with Facetime in lieu of face-to-face time.

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  7. Why Everyone Should Have a "Yes, No, Maybe" List

    Why Everyone Should Have a "Yes, No, Maybe" List

    By Gabriela Herstik

    No matter your relationship status, one thing still holds true; you have a right to pleasure. Scream it from the rooftops because it’s true. You have a right to know what feels good for you, you have a right to know what sets your soul aflame, you have a right to know what you’re into, and you have the right to claim it. But the reverse is also true; you have a right to know what you don’t like, you have a right to have boundaries, and you have the right to say no, always. A “yes, no, maybe” list is a list of things you’re into, some things you’re willing to try and things you’re absolutely not willing to try. This isn’t a document set in stone, instead, it’s something that can help you discover what turns you on, while also helping inspire your love and sex life.

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  8. Playing with Matches: Online vs. Offline Dating

    Playing with Matches: Online vs. Offline Dating

    by Amara Purlle

    It's a meat market out there. I grew up in an analog world. Achieving any genuine romantic connection through an app, I scoffed, would yield superficial results at best. On the other hand, with a lot of online dating, it’s easy enough to tell who’s looking for a random hook-up, who wants someone to nest with, and who’s open to grabbing a drink and seeing if anything progresses without any string-like attachments. Thus raiseth the questions: What works for you? What is your end goal? Is boredom reason enough to try and connect with someone? Which method is the most effective use of your time and energy?

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