A Minimalist’s Gift Guide for the Bride-to-Be

Around this time of the year when wedding bells are ringing everywhere and it seems like all the time, I always think of George. He was one of those strong, silent types, although he was noticed wherever he went…Maybe more like, wherever we took him. George was the guest of honor at all of my girlfriends’ bachelorette parties. We invited him to his first last-hurrah in Arizona, he raged with us on a cruise to Mexico and met his tragic and untimely demise in Palm Springs where he suffered an untreatable injury (cactus, ouch!) and was permanently deflated. You know where this is going... Yes, George was our inflatable man-friend.

Despite his epic adventures, one thing our guest George never had to worry about was gift giving during this rite of passage. While it’s easy to shop for wedding and bridal shower gifts with the help of a registry, bachelorette party gifts can be tricky. When it comes to celebrating the transition from miss to matrimony, the one big question haunts every member on the "I-do Crew"… How much naughtiness is appropriate? Well, it all depends on your friend’s personality and attitude about sex, but in my opinion there’s a way to strike the perfect balance between lewd and lovely for every type of bride.


Gag Gifts

As a minimalist, I avoid gag gifts like a plague. Instead of something that makes you giggle, go for something that will make the bride comfortable in exploring her sexual desires… Something that will make her intrigued with a “Hmmm” instead of, “That’s hilarious.” Put some thought into it and gift the future Mrs. something that won’t just languish at the back of her closet for the rest of her married life.



An obvious choice when it comes to sexy gifts is lingerie. A lot of folks go for teddies, but I prefer matching lace bra and panties for practical purposes. How many times have you worn a teddy instead of bra and panties within last 12 months? Yes, I am definitely applying the 12-month minimalist’s rule even with sexy gifts. Just because it is supposed to be a sexy gift, it doesn’t mean that they have to less practical!


Massage & Self Care Treatments

For the shy bride, consider body massage oils. Any natural body oils such as peppermint, lavender, lemongrass, eucalyptus and tea tree make great body massage oils. If your wallet permits, add an oil-warmer as a set. Another item for the shy bride is a couple’s massage gift certificate at their local spa or at their honeymoon destination. Couple’s massage can be a fabulous gateway to an alluring encounter.


Sex Toys

For the not-so-shy-about-sex-bride, help keep her sex life humming with a vibrator. It takes two to be in a marriage, and that includes between the sheets! Playtime doesn’t always stay between the sheets for the adventurous: a wireless remote controlled bullet is a fun playtime gift made especially for couples. If you are looking for his-and-her gift set, I recommend a massaging cock ring and a rabbit style vibe to keep both of them purring with love.


Sexual Wellness Tools

Marital bliss stems from a healthy body and mind, and exciting marital sex is part and parcel. Popularized by Fifty Shades of Grey, a set of Ben Wa balls will help keep your BFF’s kegels in shape. They're a great pick – they'll help tone her pelvic floor muscles and increase pleasure sensitivity. Select a sets that's made with body-safe silicone tto keep cleaning super easy for her. Trust me on this: ease of care and clean up matters!


Gift Cards

If you are unsure of the bride’s sexual comfort zone or if it is appropriate you to get too personal, then there is always the option of gift cards. Treat your pal to a gift certificate to an online pleasure retailer or adult shop, where she can choose the pleasure products she really wants!

No matter what gift you decide to go with, it really is the thought that counts. Gift giving should be fun for the giver and receiver, so remember to have fun as you raise a naughty toast to your amazing friend!