A Little to the Left: Self-Care through Orgasm


That’s a nice word, isn’t it? It inspires thoughts of renovation, of renewal, and perhaps reinvention. It makes order out of chaos. And what are our lives roughly 70% of the time, if not Chaotic?

Such is the plight of the modern woman. Our seemingly Sisyphean attempts at maintaining a work/life balance might have us sitting in a combusting kitchen like the “This is Fine” dog. We juggle so many things, and we usually find ways to restore the expended energy so we can continue juggling day after day. But we don’t always tend to the energy that needs restoring the most.

Set aside all things on the daily battlefront for a second, and let’s talk about sex. Are you having it? Is it good? Can it be better? More specifically, let’s talk about the Big O—how are your Orgasms?

This isn’t about hitting it and quitting; it’s about self-care through sexual satisfaction. Setting time aside to achieve orgasm is when you make the time to take the time for your sexual self. It’s an opportunity to get to a level of intimacy (with yourself or a partner) that you thought you’d already reached. It’s a time for your physical body to meet with your emotional, psychological, and sexual desires. It can be done.


How Do I Love Me...

It’s important to note that orgasm is about release, abandoning inhibition is the point of the exercise—every time—whether you’re playing solo or not. Instant gratification is also okay, in fact, it’s totally encouraged.

Some of us are more blessed than others, achieving orgasm with our fingertips and creative imagination. Others of us need to do some extra work to get there. However, both require you to do real self-investigation, where you must be honest with yourself and your partner about what works and what doesn’t. There is no room for BS when you are chasing the Big O.

One way to get there is with good old-fashioned vibrators. There are different vibrators for different types of play to achieve different types of orgasms. Depending on which corner of the internet you ask, there might be four types of orgasms, or 15. For this purpose, we’ll focus on the main four, each as a self-date getting you reacquainted with the familiar in a new way.



Most women need some kind of clitoral stimulation to climax, this is Orgasm 101. Try Bcute Classic or Bcurious Premium to focus on the upper part of the clitoral hood during foreplay. Start on the lowest setting, gradually working your way up to the more intense and faster settings. The more time you take to get the blood flowing and get in the zone, the more heightened the arousal.



tThe V-gasm takes longer to unfold, but lasts longer. Size and shape can be important here. Depending on your preference, experiment with more classically contoured pleasure products like our Bdesired Deluxe Pearl or Bgood Deluxe Curve. Both have expertly defined curves to add to your experience. Vibrators with curved heads will help you find your g-spot more easily. This is where something like the Bgee Classic comes in. The deeper recesses of the mind certainly coincide with those of the body. Once your monkey mind/lizard brain has shut off and you’ve spotted your G, have your partner focus his/her attention there as well.



Sometimes called the “twin orgasm”, a woman’s arousal prior to penetration is absolutely key here. Lots of heavy petting and kissing to get her as close to climax before you engage in your favorite positions is highly recommended. Bring it all up to 11 with the Bwild Classic Bunny and the Bwild Deluxe Bunny. The pleasure potential of simultaneous penetration and clitoral stimulation are what made rabbit vibrators as iconic as the little black dress. The Bwild Classic Bunny is perfectly proportioned for keen novices, while the Deluxe Bunny works wonders for the discerning aficionado.



Che Bnaughty Premium Unleashed confidently ushers you to full scale, synapse-redirecting, high-priestess-summoning realness. It’s perfect for partner play because it uses a wireless remote. A partner is optional in achieving multiple orgasms, but it certainly can be exhilarating to share this sexy secret with a partner, either in the bedroom or out and about. You don’t know when or how long those buttons will be pushed, which just ramps up the excitement on so many pillow-biting levels.


The Science on Our Side

Still not convinced to start self-care through sexual exploration? A recent essay in Aeon provided the following factoids to back up just how beneficial having regular orgasms can be. In case you didn’t know, orgasms can:


  • Boost the immune system
  • Improve digestion (go on, have that post-coital pizza)
  • Regulate menstruation
  • Relieve pain
  • Discourage breast cancer cells from developing into tumors (!!!)<
  • Slow the aging process.

The benefits are similar for men, resulting in reduced stress and depression, improved cognitive function and sleep, and reduced risk of heart attack and prostate cancer.

It’s time to balance out the daily chaos and reclaim some orgasmic Me time! Sexual healing is just that...healing. And letting go of your inhibitions is the first step. Really sit with and examine the details of what you need to let go of and what you want to become. You might not realize it, but you might accidentally start transitioning into your best self just from taking the time to know yourself in this most intimate way.