Sexuality

  1. Don’t Touch My Hair...Unless I Tell You To

    Don’t Touch My Hair...Unless I Tell You To
    Hey--is my mic on? Good; I have a few things to get off my chest. To the surprise of literally no one, 2020 started ugly and it only got uglier. It’s been more than rough for everyone. This year didn’t stop at a global health pandemic and losing some of our most beloved icons; it threw in an extra helping of crazy ahhh weather too. It’s been ghastly, but like sex, life requires patience. Let’s all collectively breathe and agree to look at this from a different angle.
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  2. Why Black Sex Work is Essential Work

    Why Black Sex Work is Essential Work
    If sex work is indeed “the world’s oldest profession”, and the end goal of that work is 100% customer satisfaction, then sex work is also the world’s oldest essential work. It makes little sense that such hostility and shame toward sex work and sex workers still exists, especially towards Black female sex workers.
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  3. 10 Sex Tips for Men

    10 Sex Tips for Men
    There can be a lot of discrepancy between what men think women want in the bedroom and what they really want. You don’t necessarily have to go full Christian Grey, but you also don’t need to wait for an especially romantic occasion to have a seriously orgasmic time. Make things memorable and let the following tips be your guide.
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  4. I’m 28 and Just Learned What a Real Orgasm Is

    a woman lies on the bed looking satisfied and happy

    By Erika E. Wade

    This is gonna be sad, but I believe I’m having a crisis. What if sex hasn’t led to orgasms for me in the past. What if I was so good at faking it, I fooled myself? At this age, and with the amount of sex toys I have, I’m realizing having an orgasm during sex is, well, hard. Now I know what my Big O feels like, I’m going for it at all costs. Maybe you can too.

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  5. An Intro to Lesbian Sex: Next Level Intimacy

    An Intro to Lesbian Sex

    By Jessica Buck

    Provided consent is in place, taking your intimacy with someone to the next level means opening up a vulnerability that coincides with pleasure. We learn how to navigate this vulnerability with practice, but your first few times can be awkward and confusing, especially if you've received little to no true education on the physical and emotional logistics of "how to have sex." Let’s change that with a walk through of the basics of lesbian sex, because vulva on vulva action is worth the deep dive and frankly, it's the tits (pun intended).
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  6. Protect Your Energy: How to Energetically Cleanse Yourself After Casual Sex

    a person dips into a bath filled with rose petals

    By Gabriela Herstik

    Like everything else, sex is an energy exchange. And for those of us who engage in casual sex, the energy isn’t always exactly what we expect. When we sleep with someone, we form a connection with them, even if it’s for one night; sometimes this connection dissipates, and sometimes it lingers. If we are aware of our subtle body, and the energy system along the base of our spine known as the chakras, then we can make sure that we cleanse and clear the lingering energetic remnants of our sexual partners. In this piece Gabriela Herstik shares some simple techniques for cleansing our auric and energetic bodies after engaging in casual sex. Through breathwork, visualization, and working with tools like sacred smoke and ritual baths, we can make sure that we’re honoring our energy as much as our physical body, and that we’re having the safest sex possible in every realm.

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  7. Black Girls Masturbate

    woman in bed wearing a black bra smiling looking content and satisfied

    By Erika E. Wade

    Growing up black in America is tough, especially when everyone but your own cultural group tells you how to do it. Apparently, it’s even more taboo for black women to touch themselves. Well, I’m Erika. I’m a black woman from Alabama, and I touch myself. And it feels really good.
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  8. Seduce Yourself: Taking Nudes as Sexual Self Empowerment

    a person with short hair wearing lingerie lying down on a bed smiling taking a selfie with a phone

    By Gabriela Herstik

    Taking nudes can be a powerful way to connect more deeply with yourself and your body, it can be something that brings you and your partner closer together, or it can simply become a ritual of self-love and adoration. Read on for your B Swish guide to taking nudes

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  9. Asking for Consent is Absolutely Sexy

    two people embrace looking into each. other's eyes.  in a moment of intimacy

    By Erika E. Wade

    Why can asking for consent be so weird? In a lot of communities, it isn’t. In kink communities, consent conversations are as “normal” as fumbling with a condom wrapper in the dark. Why can’t we do that in mainstream society? It seems like consent requires a little more debate and disagreement for the rest of us, but it actually could be so easy. It's time to normalize talking about pleasure, and that includes boundaries. Keep it respectful. Keep it cute. Asking for consent is sexy too.

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  10. Reading Erotica: A Personal Essay

    a book is held open between two legs wearing tall stockings on a bed

    By Jessica Buck

    When I started masturbating, all I knew was channel 3 after 10 pm. But when my great aunt passed and we got a bunch of her stuff, I discovered my aunts love for a classic erotic novels. It was a new world for me and I loved it because I already loved reading in general. I'd sneak and read chapters late at night and hid the books under my mattress. THEN when I got a computer in my room, I discovered erotic stories on Xanga, a platform I used to frequently blog. This was my mid-day porn when I couldn't watch Channel 3 or be caught with an erotic novel in my hands. And thus shaped my Freshman-Senior summers of curiosity.

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